“I am still me. And in middle age I can finally say that, for the most part, I am ok with it. Sure there are some jagged edges that continue to snag on the fabric of my life. There is a down side to nearly every good thing about me, but no one escapes this place without carrying a whole load of contradictions about themselves. It’s kind of the only thing that makes us interesting enough to have stories to tell.” ~ Nadia Bolz-Weber
Nadia shares about her friend, Nikki Meyers, who speaks about the path of 1%. It feels doable to imagine engaging myself 1% more or perhaps 1% less into my daily living. Can I listen for 1% longer? Am I able to create a pause that offers me a 1% deep breath opportunity perhaps preventing me from a reactive comment? How about being 1% less frustrated with myself when I’ve missed the mark? Because 1% is good. But more importantly, 1% is possible as Nadia and I would both agree.
Where I can become entangled and ensnared is when I’m trying to become something that clearly I am not meant to be. No amount of tutoring in mathematics or online courses are going to make me into a competent accountant.
Growing 1% in areas invites a softer, a more authentic version of myself. This is nourishing soil where I long to be planted, to take root and shelter underneath. It feels sustainable, less goal and striving oriented and teeming with infinite possibilities.
I am engaging with the idea of 1% when I am taking baby steps and switching things up just a bit. Noticing even the slightest of change that might encourage the other 99%. An ongoing captivation to remain curious, open, flexible, in the flow and resting within pockets full of peace as they present themselves.
This feels right on point as we edge closer into the holiday season and the myriad of ways that one may feel while in the midst. I was speaking with a newly bereaved widow who is dreading the upcoming season. Sharing with me that Thanksgiving was her husband’s favorite, he cooked the entire meal and how could they move through it now? What helped me was to keep myself in the present moment. I knew our holidays would never be the same without our son and that whatever we did decide upon was going to be what it was for this year, and that it could change from year to year just as we were.
I reassured her that they could create what felt the most nurturing and healing for them as they moved closer to the day. Even if they were uncertain, to continue to inquire within and including her sons in the planning was essential. They could also throw it all out the window and order pizza for Thanksgiving. Who knew one could do such a thing? I do because I’ve heard countless stories of how people have reinvented their observance of these days. Creating fluid choices which could diminish some of the worry and anxiety and might even evolve into new traditions?
Leaning into the 1% more or less may become the significant ingredient. Informing us as to how to navigate the holidays in a way that becomes manageable. Including an addendum where each individual is allowed wiggle room and grace to change their minds as well. I believe more blood pressure cuffs would be monitoring within the healthy range if this could become our default mode. I’m all in, how about you?
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