A tender seed of self-soothing is a well spring of the most amazing healing properties I have ever stumbled upon. It came in slowly for me in my meditation practice and has informed me gently that she has always been available. The needs of my heart could not always be met, thus in order to protect myself I turned away from my tender heart and toward my mind.
Sarah Blondin, the author of Heart-Minded, a transformative and exquisite book which was recommended by a sister of the heart to me, has become a treasure box that I’m slowly delving into and digesting. I have been listening to it as an audio book as her voice reminds me of the consistency of milk and honey. Ever so slowly dripping into the tiny crevices within me which bloom when acknowledged, held, turned towards, and felt, even if not always understood.
She has gently taken my hand within hers and is leading me once again on my soul’s excavation as this is an ongoing invitation and practice. Curious as to what I may uncover presently that was not ready until now for my discovery. Thank goodness for this Mother Wisdom that is plentiful and abundant, patiently waiting on our hearts.
Self-soothing is not numbing, it is not distraction, it is not running away from, it is rather a welcomed slowing down, checking in with myself to ask how I am in this now moment? Meeting without judgment or resistance what is echoed back to be. Placing my hand upon my heart and hearing myself say, “I see you, I hear you, I love you.” Becoming aware of my breath and observing how swiftly and effortless it can bring me back into my heart is self-soothing. Choosing my heart rather than rambling through the parched, arid, crevices of my mind who is trying to do its job of protecting me from whatever might be arriving. The dilemma that I have discovered within this, is when it is protecting me from pain whether real or anticipated, it also can rob me of my pleasure filled moments as well.
Reassuring my mind that it is doing its job and that we can work in tandem, together. Encouraging it to rest, while my heart and my body become my informants, gathering the needed information that my mind does not have to go into over drive to sort and figure out.
Time outs within myself, not outside of myself is where my self-soothing resides. Engaging all of my senses are activating my natural and intuitive self. My mind is not familiar nor always comfortable with my heart language and that’s alright as I reassure her that I will call upon her as needed. A mind likes and needs a job so I offer her one. I ask my mind to become my observer, my witness and to take notes for herself on how she believes I am navigating my world when my body and heart are at the helm. Thus far, she is nodding her head in approval and I have even sensed an exhale or two.
As the holidays approach, our inner worlds might not reflect what we observe outside of ourselves; may this tiny seed of self-soothing be attentively and lovingly tended to. Self-soothing is an inside job and only if we can pause long enough, checking in with oneself, can we possibly feel what might be calming and peace filled. The longing for, missing the ones who are not seated at our tables or in our physical spheres, are forever tucked safely in this inner kingdom of the heart, where this seed of self-soothing patiently awaits. Do not fear to enter into this inner chamber as our exterior world can hold far more challenges. It is a practice, there is no rush, it waits and once activated it cannot help but generously offer sweet fruits of vitality, sustenance and comfort.
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