“We all have stores we’ve told ourselves, because with stories we can define ourselves and say, ‘well, that’s just me.’ Stories prevent us from growing. The only constant in life is growth. It’s in nature; it’s everywhere. Growth and evolution are written in our genes. What if your ‘truth’ is just a story you’ve been telling yourself.” ~ Astro Butterfly
I am acutely aware of the stories I may have grabbing at my attention and most of them are simply fiction. They can keep me in a stagnant loop that is relentless, unless I pause, question and inquire as to where these stories are originating from and become compassionately curious with myself.
Some may be generational stories that have been passed down to us. Stories such as: no one in our family is good in math so it will always be a struggle, to our worth is based solely on doing and our accomplishments. I can catch myself too wondering when someone is not getting back to me that perhaps I’ve done or said something to upset them? Oy, absolutely crazy making and such a huge blood sucker of life force energy that could be channeled into life giving moments. Opportunities for practicing once again how to human.
I have had so many close calls where I almost said something from a story line that I was allowing to high jack my thoughts. Later discovering that once again I was fabricating a narrative not based on truth and I felt as if I had dodged a speeding bullet once again. I’m learning, yet this one is a trap I can easily fall into if I’m not vigilant and taking a necessary pause to inquire within. Lather, Rinse and Repeat.
Reading stories to my own children, to my students conjures up the warmest memories I have. I become familiar with another through the sharing of their stories. This is the high end of story telling, yet the low end is when we are repeating stories to ourselves that we’ve either been handed, are believing or have simply made up around our personhood that have no relevance to who we are today.
This feels like such a valuable practice, inviting us to take out our flashlights and venture into the vaults of our stories. Perhaps questioning, tossing out those that are no longer ours to keep and to imagine what might actually be worthy of our time and attention.
The most powerful stories may be the ones we tell ourselves, says Brené Brown. But beware, they’re usually fiction.
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